I'm sure you are delighted to know that HS2 high-speed rail service will be coming to a station near you in the next 12-17 years. Well, when I say 'near you' what I mean is Crewe. When and if it ever actually makes it to Wilmslow is anyone's guess.
So, fellow travellers, in just a few years less than it took to build the Great Wall of China HS2 will be heading your way. Obviously you will need to travel to Crewe to board it but hey-ho your journey has to start somewhere.
This is stunning news as the trip from Wilmslow to Euston currently takes two hours so travelling to Crewe, waiting for your connection then taking HS2 to London will mean your overall journey time will be err... never mind you will enjoy the experience.
And the cost of land, track, trains, the whole shooting match is estimated to be no more than £50B unless you believe the Institute of Economic Affairs who say it's more likely to be £80B but c'mon whose counting?
This is BIG news, in fact so big Cheshire East are advertising the service right now. Full page ads, no less. I think it's a great idea to start the promotional campaign early lest we forget.
I have already set my alarm for 2027 and booked a taxi to take me to Crewe. Okay, I may need to hit the snooze button for another six years but at least I won't miss my train.
Cheshire East is clearly a forward thinking organisation and sufficiently well funded they can afford to place full-page ads promoting a service that won't actually be available for 12-18 years.
Other councils are closing down care facilities, cutting services and couldn't contemplate the cost of advertising a facility that won't be in existence for a decade and a half. Not so CEC who have no such cash restrictions especially when it comes to self-aggrandisement.
If they are starting their promotional campaign now imagine the cost by the time the first train rolls into Crewe. You could probably buy a hospital, school and a waste transfer station with that kind of money.
God knows what the world will look like in 20028. Given our government's proclivity for firing off missiles we could be embroiled in something rather more pressing than HS2.
Nevertheless CEC is delivering a pre-emptive strike to ensure no one forgets the part it played in the planning process. Before a turf has been turned (or even grown) the marketing campaign has begun and YOU, my friends, are picking up the tab.
Who wants schools and hospitals any way?
The views and opinions expressed in this column are those of the author and do not necessarily represent those of alderleyedge.com.